Upon finishing his lunch, Ryder put his plate up on the kitchen counter and put his scraps in the rubbish bin. Without any prompting from me.

This may seem a trivial thing to be proud of, but my little man is only 20 months old. Just when I begin to feel frustrated at doing the same thing every day, over and over, something like this happens and I think to myself, “maybe I’m not doing so bad.” While I may not be actively teaching and explaining my every move to Ryder, he is still learning by watching. Observing.

While on one hand I am pleased as punch that he is picking up on good habits without being “taught”, it also gives me some food for thought. If he is picking up on my subconscious good habits, what bad habits is he also observing? Is he paying as much attention to my drinking habits as he is to my tidying? Does he register my constant snacking on the same level as putting things away when finished? This concerns me in the sense that, I’ve never thought of this before. It makes sense though, if he notices my positive actions then of course he’ll notice my negative actions too, though he will not know which are good and which are bad.

Instead of dwelling on the concerns I have, I am going to use this experience and the thought process it triggered as a learning experience. I am going to try to be more mindful of my actions, after all I am trying to set a good example for Ryder. I need to remember that he sees my good and bad habits but cannot differentiate between the two. By being more mindful I can ensure that the actions he sees displayed at home are a positive influence to learn from and model, even if they aren’t being taught to him directly.



Have you had any experiences recently that have opened up a whole new train of thought for you? Please share below!


13 thoughts on “Influence

  1. I think it’s a timely reminder for me as well. You just don’t think about it, and then you catch your child doing something, and you wonder, how did she learn that? It had to have come from you, but do you even remember doing it? They’re such sponges. Thanks for the warning! Mamagoingsolo here, catching you from #IBOT πŸ™‚

    • Welcome back! I definitely agree with your “sponges” comment, it’s amazing how much they pick up on without us realising! Happy Birthday and thanks for stopping by xx

  2. I have been thinking about smacking lately … for years I went along with what I was told (spare the rod & spoil the child) and it is only now that my kids are pretty much grown (19 & 16) that I’ve realised I don’t necessarily agree – and that’s okay! I have my reasons :-). Better late than never LOL, I guess I never had the time to think deeply about things like this when the kids were small so I’m thinking now. Funnily enough even though with my HEAD I thought smacking was okay, I didn’t do it much so the heart knows …

    Visiting form #teamIBOT xxx

  3. I read this last night and all day I’ve been watching myself and constantly catching myself out with my bad little habbits (that I hope Miss 2 wont have noticed yet…).Visiting from DP blog Carnival. Nic @ Mums Take Five

    • Thanks for stopping by!! I’ll be sure to pop by your blog πŸ™‚ Isn’t it funny how much we notice when we are actively looking out for it? It is a good opportunity to evaluate our actions and make changes where necessary. I’m glad this post stuck with you through the night and you were mindful of it once you woke up.

  4. Good post – and so true. Conscious living is something I have to remind myself about often, especially when we are the role models.

  5. Thanks for sharing! It’s amazing how our little ones can teach us so many things! Love it! Glad to have found your blog via the DP Carnival!! xx

    The Urban Ma

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